Have you ever realized how many thoughts, behaviors, goals we have that are mainly determined by the amount of approval we can get?
Similarly with what we avoid because of the fear of rejection. Because we have already once or twice been rejected when exhibiting such behavior.
The problem is that both of those concepts are getting in the way of us expressing ourself genuinely. And I believe that the more we’re gaining experience in life, the more we’re getting corrupt by those principles.
Those are maybe the strongest emotions we have to deal with, and as we know it we mainly deal with our life subconsciously. I mean, we deal with some of the most important factors in our life in an automatic way.
If we think about it, it becomes abvious that as a young baby, then as a child, we all had to seek approval from our parents. It was almost a question of life or death. A baby can’t survive without adults taking care of them. How important this approval had been for so long and at such a young age for all of us! We got into the habit of seeking approval and running away from all kind rejection very quickly. And it became certainly more and more important in our life as we grew up.
Unfortunately most of the systems we live in, being social systems, play on the power of approval or rejection. Do what I ask, you’ll get approval. Make my life harder for any reason, I’ll get you rejected. And that’s very efficient. Starting with school which mainly authorizes thinking as long as it is compliant with what is expected of you.
Now the real power comes from being independent from this emotional pressure. Then can you express yourself freely. And I don’t mean that you can only express your ideas. I mean that you can fully behave the way that you feel deeply. Without having to think about it first. And you can continue to behave this way no matter what happens around you. From this point only are you standing out. Not for the sake of being different, but to really bring value.
Your value!
