My main problem today, is that if I get in a relationship with a girl I quickly become dependent from her!
It has been so unbearable the last time (more than 10 years ago!!!) that I’ve never wanted to live that again.
For some reason, I am more or less completely back in this situation with a girl friend. Not a love relationship, but anyway, a girl that has become someone special in my life. And the results are exactly the same!
Now the only thing that matters is that I handle this situation and find the way out!!!
I’ve come to a conclusion that seems really interesting: what gets us hooked on someone is a value that we deeply feel in need of. And that person exhibits it!
As I’ve already said, the relationship becomes like a solution to our deep lack of this trait. And being (or only feeling) rejected by this person is experienced like being rejected by this value itself!!!
What I want to point out here is that we are very probably not hooked on a person, but on a particular trait that has a deep resonance with ourself.
And so, our problem is not linked to a relationship but to a trait that we value so much, and feel a deep need of. And that changes everything in the understanding of what is happening!
I think now that the only real problem is a problem of relationship betwen me and this value… nothing else!
